


Make A Move

by SpellStorm



Series: Pesterchum Friendship [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Best Friends, Chatting & Messaging, Children, First Meetings, Friendship, Online Friendship, Pesterlog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-03
Updated: 2014-10-03
Packaged: 2018-02-19 17:59:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2397602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpellStorm/pseuds/SpellStorm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is JOHN EGBERT, and your friendless existence is about to take a turn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Make A Move

**Author's Note:**

> I’m only partway through Act 5 of Homestuck, but I was inspired and had to write. You know how that is (or at least I hope you do).  
> I got this idea from the letter John sent to Jade with her birthday present, when he says without her, he’d never have met Rose and Dave.  
> Please keep in mind that I’m making most of this information up as I go. I don’t know how old they were when they met, or how exactly they met, or even all the basic information about their families and such. I also don’t know exactly how Pesterchum works. I’m creating what I need to.

Your name is JOHN EGBERT, and your friendless existence is about to take a turn.

You’ve always thought your DAD was a pretty cool guy, despite all the baking, but today, on your TENTH BIRTHDAY, he has become your favorite person on Earth.

You sit at your desk in front of your NEW COMPUTER, wondering what to do first. Surf the Web? Customize the background? Browse the applications?

You decide the third option is the best. You select the START icon in the bottom left corner and begin clicking.

It’s mostly just computer set up crap. You do find the GAME folder and play something called MAHJONG, until you lose for the fifth time in a row and give up.

You’ve just opened another mini yellow folder when you see something called PESTERCHUM. On impulse, you click it.

A small window pops up on the screen. Upon closer inspection, it appears to be an online chat room. That’d be awesome... if you had any friends to chat with. You sigh and prepare to click the x.

A ding stops you. What was that? You look at the chat room again and notice a name is now displayed in the CHUMROLL. The name is gardenGnostic. Frowning, you double-click it and another small window appears, this one white. Across the top is text that reads:

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering ???? --

Under that are the initials GG, one of those punctuation marks that is two dots on top of each other (you can never remember what those are called), and a message.

GG: hi! :)

There’s a box at the bottom of the page for a reply.

You hesitate. You’ve always been told not to talk to strangers, especially online. You should click out of the chat room and leave it alone.

But on the other hand, isn’t everyone a stranger until you get to know them? It couldn’t hurt to talk for a little bit. This person seems friendly. And besides, you don’t know about that second part, but no one with a username with the word garden in it could be dangerous, right?

The skinny cursor blinks at you imploringly.

You hesitantly type a reply and hit enter.

????: Hey.

GG quickly answers.

GG: you popped up on the new users page so i thought i’d welcome you :D

New users page? Maybe it’s an admin.

????: I just got a computer today. This was already installed.

GG: yeah, pesterchum comes with a lot of computers now. its pretty popular.

GG: i’m Jade, by the way :)

GG: Jade Harley.

Now you’re a little worried. She wants to exchange names? You haven’t even been talking for a full minute! This is exactly like the situation you’ve seen in those videos at school.

You decide it’d be a good time to leave well enough alone.

You’re stopped, once again, by a ding.

GG: look, i’m sorry if i seem overeager or creepy.

GG: i just dont have many friends and i get excited.

GG: i’ll leave you alone if you want.

You shouldn’t, but you do.

????: You dont have friends at school?

GG: i dont go to a school.

GG: my grandpa and i live on an island in the pacific.

GG: we’re pretty isolated.

GG: i do have a dog.

GG: but its not the same.

????: at least you have a reason. I’m just a loser.

GG: :(

GG: i’m sure thats not true.

GG: but in any case.

GG: maybe we could be friends?

GG: or try.

GG: you dont even have to tell me your name.

GG: i could call you by your chumhandle.

GG: once you make one.

After a moment’s consideration, you say:

????: I’d like that, jade.

????: :)

GG -- Jade -- guides you through the process of creating a chum handle and choosing a text color. You settle on the name ghostyTrickster and the color blue.

\-- ghostyTrickster [GT] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] \--

GT: so how long have you had a pesterchum?

GG: about 5 months. my grandpa ordered me a new computer because my dog knocked the first one out of my window. like you, pesterchum was already installed.

A thought occurs to you.

GT: how old are you, exactly?

GG: i turned 10 during the winter!

GG: although its never winter here.

GG: i got an electric guitar :)

She could be lying, but how could she have gotten the age dead-on? You could be a teenager, for all she knows.

GT: wow. thats weird. todays my birthday.

GG: how is that weird?

GG: happy birthday, by the way.

GT: i’m 10 today.

GT: and thanks.

GG: !!!

GG: :D

GG: thats awesome! i figured you were maybe in your teens?

GG: i dunno. just a guesstimate.

GG: i’m glad i’m wrong :)

GG: i’ve got an idea.

GT: what?

GG: i could tell you were a little uneasy earlier about being friends with someone on the internet. do you want me to send you a picture? you can see what i look like and that i’m who i say i am.

GT: you can do that?

GG: yep :)

GG: just a minute.

You wait for a total of eight before another ding.

GG: sorry, i had to find a decent one.

GG: here you go! :)

A link appears in the box. You click on it and a picture pops up. At your age, you’ve never thought much about how girls look. But she’s pretty.

GT: you’re pretty.

You mentally smack yourself for sounding so stupid.

GG: thanks, GT.

She's trusted you with her full name and a picture. You decide to trust her, as well.

GT: john egbert.

GG: what?

GT: you called me GT.

GG: thats your handle.

GT: yeah. but I know your name. so its only fair. i’m john egbert.

GG: :)

GG: its nice to meet you, John. :)

Aaaand that’s enough sharing time for now.

GT: so what else do you do on this thing? just talk?

GG: pretty much. although there is one thing you should watch out for.

GT: whats that?

GG: trolls.

You’re confused.

GT: trolls?

GG: yeah. they’re super annoying. i wouldve gotten rid of my account if it wasn’t the only way to find friends.

GT: what do they do?

GG: just, you know, troll you. they think its funny, i think.

GG: i just try to ignore them.

GG: blocking them doesn’t work. i tried.

GT: do you know who they are?

GG: no clue. but they’re jerks, for sure.

GT: how many are there?

GG: not sure exactly. i’ve counted at least 4.

GG: adiosToreador, carcinoGeneticist, grimAuxiliatrix, and gallowsCalibrator.

GG: they type weird.

GG: idk

GG: hold on a second.

GT: do you think they’re older kids?

GT: oh, ok.

GG: sorry about that

GG: one of my other friends just came online.

GG: she doesn’t have good internet connection, so she isn’t on much.

GG: but i’m not sure. they could be.

GG: they don’t act like it.

GT: how old is your other friend?

GG: i have 2. they’re both 10, as well.

GG: their birthdays are actually pretty close to mine.

GT: how long have you known them?

GG: since my birthday, actually. so like 4 months. they both popped up as new users.

GG: so i said hello.

GG: i’m a very friendly person.

GG: if you couldn’t tell.

GG: :)

GT: i could definitely tell.

GG: :)

GG: oh!!!

GT: what?

GG: i just had the best idea!

You’re not sure if you want to know.

GT: what idea?

GG: :)

GG: i could introduce you 3! maybe you live close or something.

GG: and if not, you know what they say.

GT: ?

GG: 2 is company, 3 is a crowd, and 4...

GT: what is four?

GG: no idea. i don’t think anyone thought that through.

GG: but i’d like to think four is a party :)

GG: or just a really awesome get together.

GG: so

GG: what do you think?

GT: think?

GG: about meeting them.

Sure, it’s kind of odd, meeting someone’s other friends when you just met them about a half hour ago. But at the same time....

GT: well... i guess it would be nice to meet more people.

GG: great! my other friend just got on, too.

GG: i’ll tell them both and give them your chumhandle.

GG: and then give you theirs.

GG: hang on.

This time it’s thirteen minutes.

GG: okay!

GG: their handles are turntechGodhead and tentacleTherapist.

GG: don’t ask.

You decide not to and and add them to your CHUMROLL.

A new white box pops up immediately.

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

TT: Hi, GT. I’m Rose Lalonde.

GT: hey, rose. i’m john egbert. so you’re jades friend?

TT: Yes, one of them.

GG: i’m going to go feed my dog and get a snack. you keep talking to them :)

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

GT: jade said you’re 10?

TT: Yes. My birthday was last month.

TT: And your 10th is today?

GT: yeah.

TT: Happy Birthday.

GT: thanks.

And yet another window opens.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

TG: yo

GT: hey. john egbert.

TG: dave strider

TG: harley said its your birthday.

TG: so happy bday.

GT: harley?

GT: oh, jade.

GT: thanks.

TT: What do you do for fun?

GT: mostly watch monster movies. i play some video games. i like magic and pranks and stuff.

GT: what do you do?

TT: I read a lot.

TT: I also play the violin.

GT: cool. i’m learning piano.

GT: you’re in 5th grade?

TT: This fall, yes.

TT: I think piano is beautiful. I chose violin because I like the way the strings feel under my fingers.

GT: so am I.

GT: i decided on piano cause you don’t have to blow into it and you can sit while playing it.

TG: you talking to lalonde too?

GT: yeah.

TG: she’s alright

TG: got any siblings?

GT: nope.

TG: you’re lucky

GT: older or younger?

TG: older. pretty much raised me.

TG: he’s awesome but annoying.

TG: don’t ever have a sibling.

GT: well i don’t have a mom, so i don’t see that happening anytime soon.

TG: damn. sorry, man. did you know her much?

GT: she ran off when i was a baby. hasn’t so much as written. i don’t miss her.

GT: where are your parents?

TG: dead. there was a crash. i was 1. don’t remember them at all. its always just been bro and me.

GT: still, i’m sorry.

TG: i don’t sweat it. like i said, bro’s cool.

TG: like me

TT: Are you an only child, John? So far Dave is the only one of us who isn’t.

GT: yeah, i am. dave and i were just talking about our parents and his brother.

TT: Bro seems alright. Although he could probably stand to be a little more disciplinary; Dave tends to cuss.

TT: What is your home situation?

GT: “home situation”?

TT: Who do you live with?

GT: oh.

GT: my dad. mom ran off a long time ago.

TT: I’m sorry to hear that.

TT: I live with my mom. My father died when I was a toddler. It was a heart attack.

GT: i’m sorry. were you close?

TT: Closer than I am with my mother.

GT: that stinks.

GT: what’s jade’s situation? she said she lives with her grandpa.

TT: She does. We don’t know what happened to her parents or where they are. She won’t say. Every time we ask, she just changes the subject.

TT: Or goes silent and doesn’t talk for several hours.

TT: We just know she’s an only child and her grandfather is her guardian. That’s all.

TT: Hold on. I am going to add Dave to our chat so we can all talk.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] has invited turntechGodhead [TG] to join this chat --

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has accepted tentacleTherapist [TT]’s invitation --

TG: what are we talking about?

TT: Jade’s home situation.

TG: o, that

TG: yeah, man, she won’t talk about it. only says she was raised by her grandpa and then clams up.

TT: It must just be a sore subject. We shouldn’t pry.

TG: pry?

TT: Commonly paired with into. To inquire too closely into a person’s private affairs.

TT: Meaning we shouldn’t push her. If she wants to talk about it, she’ll let us know.

TG: wow, lalonde. thanks for the vocab lesson. its exactly what i wanted during my weekend

TT: Bite me, Dave.

TG: no thanks

You’re starting to feel a bit awkward. This bickering seems natural, easy. It’s obviously normal for them. You feel like an outsider.

TT: So John.

GT: yeah?

TT: Where do you live? Jade said she thought maybe we lived close.

GT: west coast. washington.

TG: not near me. i’m in texas.

TT: Definitely not close to me, either. I live in North Carolina.

GT: and jade lives on an island?

TG: yeah. its weird.

TT: Dave!

TG: what? she lives on an island in the pacific ocean with her grandpa and a dog. she doesn’t go to school and she doesn’t have any friends besides us. what part of that is normal.

TT: I admit it’s... peculiar.

TT: But Jade is our friend. Friends don’t talk about about each other.

TG: then what do you call us?

TT: Advanced acquaintances.

TG: ouch. that hurt.

TG: note the deadpan i typed that in

TG: i’ve gotta go, dudes. bro ordered chinese food.

TT: Goodbye, Dave.

GT: bye, man.

TG: later.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] and ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

GT: are you two normally like this?

TT: Unfortunately, yes. It’s not that we hate each other; we’re just very different people.

TT: It’s mostly fun, anyway.

TT: Honestly, Dave is my friend.

TT: But I’m not going to tell him that.

TT: ;)

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

GG: so? what did you think?

GT: dave’s pretty cool. so is rose. we’re talking now.

GG: ooh, invite me!!

GT: okay.

\-- ghostyTrickster [GT]gardenGnostic [GG] to join this chat --

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] \--

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] has accepted ghostyTrickster [GT]’s invitation --

GG: i’m surprised to see Dave didn’t scare you off, John.

GT: he’s a cool guy.

TT: We were just talking about pets, right, John?

GT: what?

You realize that you have actually been talking about Jade, and it might be just a bit insensitive to tell her that.

GT: oh, yeah.

GT: you know, i’ve always wanted a guinea pig.

GG: i have my dog! his name is Becquerel. i just call him Bec.

GT: what about you, rose?

TT: I used to have a cat named Jaspers. He passed away about a year ago.

TT: I know Dave doesn’t have any. He and his brother live in an apartment.

GG: where is Dave, anyway? he was on when i left.

TT: His brother got him Chinese food, apparently.

GG: ah. that explains it.

TT: I have to go. I’m hungry, and if I want to eat any time soon, I need to get downstairs before my mother.

GG: alright! bye, Rose!!

TT: Goodbye, Jade.

TT: It was nice meeting you, John. I hope we can talk again soon.

GT: it was nice meeting you too.

GT: and yeah, we’ll definitely have to.

GT: :)

TT: :)

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering ghostyTrickster [GT] and gardenGnostic [GG] \--

GT: i should probably go, too. i’ve been on this since i got it and i’m sure my dad wants to celebrate or something.

GG: okay :)

GG: i’m really glad we met, John.

GG: i think we’ll be really great friends.

GG: you, me, Dave, and Rose.

GG: :)

GT: me too.

GT: later, jade. :)

GG: later :)

\-- ghostyTrickster [GT] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] \--

You sigh and close out of the chat. After a long moment, you get up and leave your room, heading for the kitchen, not even noticing the smile on your face.

Your name is JOHN EGBERT, and you aren’t alone anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> This ended up a lot longer than planned.
> 
> (Title comes from the song I was listening to while writing and posting this: Make a Move by Icon for Hire)


End file.
